Cabins and Family Conflict
I was in a meeting recently with several professionals, one of whom is a lawyer who specializes in family litigation – most of it pertaining to family businesses. He told us that cabins cause more family disputes and litigation than family businesses do. He also noted that it is probably easier to pass on a family business to the 2nd generation than it is to pass on the family cabin. It appears a family cabin can cause more damaging disputes between siblings than a family business.
Now, if you’re not from the upper Midwest where there are many beautiful lakes, this cabin thing may not sound like a big deal. Who cares who gets the run-down, always-needs-a-fix cabin? Well, first, most “cabins” are nice, modern, second homes on a beautiful lake, river, or forested land. Secondly, for many families, it is THE place where family memories were created. As the kids grow into adulthood, the family cabin is where each kid learns to boat, fish, camp, (perhaps) hunt, ski, swim, shoot guns, climb trees, roast marshmallows, kill mosquitoes, protect the environment, split wood, bring friends, entertain guests, play games, laugh, build sand castles, and perhaps, engage in a bit of teenage romance (which mom and dad are never meant to know about).
Cabins represent memories, emotions, connections, and identity. Compared to a family business, one or more siblings might not care much about inheriting it or being part of it. They have their own lives, vocations, and so forth. But they are more likely to care deeply about the family cabin and creating their own family memories and legacies in the same cabin where they grew up.
Little wonder, then, when mom and dad die, the fight begins over who gets the cabin. “It’s one thing when mom and dad are in control. It’s a completely different issue when mom and dad are now deceased. Sometimes you think the kids are back to being 10 years old.”
This is why cabins are being placed into trusts. The trusts spell out the rules on equity, taxes, expenses, maintenance, labor, leasing/renting arrangements, and responsibilities for the family cabin. Mom and Dad need to spell out these details before they pass because cabins tend to devour dollars: when one person isn’t chipping in financially, inequities can cause family rifts and resentment.
How important is this? Just Google “family disputes cabin Minnesota,” and you’ll get multiple pages of law firms offering to help settle your most important cabin disputes. Look at several of them, and you’ll find that they all are saying basically the same thing: “don’t let your family cabin destroy your family.”
If you own a family business and are making plans to pass it along to your kids, you’re headed in the right direction. But if you also own a cabin, plan to pass it to your kids with the same attention to detail you have invested in passing your family business to them. Failure to do so may result in your kids creating permanent rifts between them as they fight over the family cabin.
